Communication is key

First post for the year!!! Screech how did that happen? Sigh oh well i will just skip the preamble and apologies and just drop a few lines on you.

Saw this weird little video entitled  "If you want a successful long-term relationship of any kind. Here Are 3 Invaluable Things To Know" and it very simply outlines exactly what I like to say here when I do come a-visiting.

And the three things are

Commitment, 

Authenticity (honesty and candor)

 and Communication.

have a look....

 
What do you think of it?
Hope to be seeing more of you this year of 2014 and the year of the horse.

Always remember to share with your significant other what you like about the other.  

Because no one has  figured out how to read minds yet!

Hellooo Hellooo

I can not believe it! I just cant believe it it has been 4 month since I last visited here!!!!!
Yes I know it is a faux pas to add so many exclamation marks but I feel as if I could add more. But as we all know time gets in the way and summer was excitedly busy so so it goes. Hope all has been good with you all.

I came across this article on Shine ( yes I still am liking their relationship aricles) and I felt I had to share the link here with you.

5 Unusual Ways Men Learn to Be Good Husbands 

Great advice I think for both husbands and wives. I especially like this section

Keep trying to get it right (source: your partner)

Really, this is the most important person you learn about marriage from. There are the little things your spouse teaches you, like "Put the toilet seat down" or "Don't bother me while I'm watching Doctor Who," but there are also the larger lessons. It took me a long time to learn how to fight. I tried fighting like my parents did, but that didn't work because Karel doesn't respond well to yelling. I tried burying it deep down so I wouldn't yell, but that didn't solve anything because I went mute. So now I've developed a very monotone delivery when I'm mad. It's not like Karel enjoys my fighting voice (I basically sound like a robot), but she doesn't tune it out. We don't scare the kids, we don't scare each other-hey, it works for us. I could only have learned to fight like a robot from being married to Karel, and I'm sure she's learned equally valuable lessons from me. I'll ask her what they are just as soon as Doctor Who is over.

What he says here is genius to me right now. Figuring how to fight properly is an important key in maintaining a good relationship, because lets face it there are going to be fights and depending how you handle those fights  makes a world of difference in your relationship.

Keep trying to get it right also speaks to my favourite mantra when it comes to relationships and marriage in particular, which as you may recall is Choose to stay married.

:D
Well that is all for now click here to read the whole article.
Hope you are having a great week.

Oh and Congratulations to my friend Racquel, wishing her and new hubbie many happy years together filled with love, success and prosperity.

Just like Tom & Jerry

The other day I overheard a guy describing his 2 year marriage and was quite tickled by it.
He likened marriage to that of a Tom and Jerry episode where you spend all your time trying to kill, trap, or maim the other and just as you about to be victorious in the kill, it hits you that there is no way life would mean anything if they were gone.
Well my first reaction was of course - No way is marriage like a Tom and Jerry pfft what did he know the little upstart.
And then congratulating a friend on 10 years of marriage, she pretty much had the same sentiment.
Her response to the my words of congratulations:- "Can you believe 10 years and I haven't  killed him yet and boy have I thought of it a few times too many LOL. But he is a good man and I do still love him so."
And I suppose if I really think about it I would have to admit that  marriage is made up of a whole lot of sparring mixed with a good dose of make-up time.

What do you think?

Enjoy the rest of your weekend.

Unsolicited Advice

Well so much for my New Years goal of visiting and continuing the conversation here. Still going to try for more often if not every week as I planned.


Recently I gave a newlywed friend some unsolicited advice.
Yes I know it is supposed to be rude dishing out unsolicited advice but you must know I love to do it, goodness this entire blog is about unsolicited advice!
It was two nuggets actually.

The first was communication of course I am like a broken record with that one.

Talk and listen.
Talk to each other about things every day. In the link I have linked to from O magazine (I am a big big fan) it suggests talking 10 minutes a day about something that is not related to work, children or dogs just like you would have if you were still dating. It is actually a great tip to remember because those little conversations remind you and your significant other that you are person and not only mother or wife.

And the other ( I literally ran behind her to tell her this one :))
Touch
Remember to touch each other, sit close together when watching tv., hold hands for a few minutes don't allow yourselves to become ships passing in the halls. This was reinforced by the O magazine article that I read about touching and the healthy benefits it has on us human beings. Touching makes us happier. Now I am not saying that you give into any X rated PDA and also not about sex, though if it leads to that woohoo, but taking time to touch each other and be with each other keeps you close literally.


Click on thise and see what I mean
http://www.oprah.com/relationships/Habits-Of-Happy-Couples-Happy-Couples-Secrets/3

Also a friend posted this link on Facebook and  I had to share it here as well! It is a man's view of  how to make it work. Marriage that is. It really is all in the mindset.
http://www.relevantmagazine.com/life/relationships/3-things-i-wish-i-knew-we-got-married

Hope you are having a great week!
And are you touching enough?

A Positive light

The shower head broke in our bathroom and water spewed all over the room.
so to have a shower the husband removed the shower head and the water flowed straight from the pipe.
I thought it very inconvenient. BUT
My daughter jumped into the shower and exclaimed with delight … "I am bathing in a fountain YAY!!”
and you know when it was my turn I couldn’t help but giggle because I honestly didn’t see a busted shower anymore but a fountain. LOL

Have a great weekend. And try to see the positive side!

It is strange how things happen.
Take this pumpkin for example.
The vine where it originated was two houses away, which would make it my neighbour's neighbour house. The vine appeared to literally float thru the air never making contact or attaching to anything in my immediate neighbour's yard to take up residence in my back yard. A really amazing occurrence don't think. It sat in my yard as if it was always intended for that spot.
Doesn't it make you think of what happens when you meet that significant someone.
For whatever reason it is never who you think it would be who really catches your fancy.

It's February the month of Love *giggle* and for the first time since I started this blog I haven't felt the zeal to actually publish a post. Oh I have ideas but my problem is squeezing in time to get it done. Sigh! This February 14th meant 14years that the hubster and I have been married. Pretty cool if you ask me.
And just like the pumpkin it seemed like a wind, albeit a strong breeze, was the cause of getting us together and growing a relationship which blossomed into a marriage.
 
I didn't have my friends take part in my AHA series this year but I decided that this affords us the opportunity to revisit the wonderful women who indulged my quest to share in that magical moment when they just knew that they had met 'the One'.
http://ishouldnthavetosay.blogspot.com/2012_02_01_archive.html

Also love this post from Thought Catalog- 15 Signs You're in Love thought I would share it just in case you were wondering.

Have a great weekend all!